On the 2nd of Sept, I had picked up the book “Who will cry when you die.” My wife had bought a book last week. She said she bought it because she saw the first page which talked about loss. I called my wife yesterday after getting into the car and said, ” I am on my way home “. She said, “You were supposed to come tomorrow”. I had an internal chatter and took a deep breath and moved onto the next topic. What I didn’t tell her was how much I wanted to be with her and family on the next day which is Sept 5th. Call it teeter-totter Sept 5th.
The day I met her for the first time and ironically the day she lost her dearest soul. I saw him in Delhi sometime in Oct 2001. He was a teenage boy. I still recollect how he ate those fish cutlets when it was my second visit to my in-law’s house after I met her in Trivandrum. This day will remain in our life as an irony. As a life partner we signed up for a permanent relationship but with my brother-in-law, it was a temporary relationship, unfortunately.
I observed during the last one year, that my daughter recollected one-day scenes from her childhood, during our Delhi days with him, as he used to take care of her when all of us used to go to work. I heard from my wife that he was unable to accept how she agreed to marry me just after a 30-minute conversation and decide to live with me for the entire life. We both used to laugh over it as well. I recollect those days when I admired his linguistic capabilities and his amazing written and oral communication skills. Every time I see an Ahmedabad flight and every time I see that ambulance corner when I cross that junction while I go to the airport, I recollect the final journey. He was a simple, nice, good human being whose time came much before and we as a family grieve on this day the enormous loss.
Whenever I heard this year the song ” Kaise Kategi Zindagi Teri Bagair” by Mohd Raffi and verses from the song Aaj Jaane Ki Zid Na Karo by Fayaaz Hashmi, “Waqt ki qaid me Zindagi hai Magar” I had moving images of him. We as a family will continue to be reminded of his loss through the recollection of his incidents, songs about enduring loss, and narratives from the books that conveys a deeper meaning on our time available in this planet
We pay homage to him as he remains in our heart forever. I was reminded of his loss when I read this poem by Robert Frost: